| Countdown |
[Jul. 12th, 2004|09:45 am] |
It's 9:45 am and that means that I am 3 hours and 15 minutes away from defending my thesis. I didn't have much time to prepare for my lecture today, so I gave my students a pop quiz :D. I know that come tomorrow I've got to make sure that they have a project for this week, God how I hate these 6 week summer classes...oh well, it puts food in my stomach and a roof over my head, so who am I to complain?
The tension is mounting and I can feel the queaziness in my stomach. I used to get the same feeling when I competed in martial arts tournaments...butterflies in the stomach, dry mouth, sweaty palms, the regular stuff--I know that if I sit and concentrate long enough I'll be able to get these feelings under control and focus on the battle, after all, that is my only purpose in this world--for I am simply a gladiator, nothing more nothing less.
{nuff said} |
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| Hello Journal My Old Friend |
[Jul. 10th, 2004|04:29 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  angry | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Dragula -- Rob Zombie | ] |
I guess being in the public spotlight makes it a wee bit difficult to update my personal journal as regularly as I'd like. I've met up with a bunch of bloggers from the mother land and we've fast become very good friends [at least in the arena of talking online], but I suppose that it's not too difficult a transition to make, since we've already determined that we like each other's personalities.
I've allowed Pebbles access to my public blog, which means that I'll be depending on this journal now more than ever to maintain my deepest thoughts and leaving my other blog to feed the innate desire for social commentary and criticism. I've gone through great pains to not mention the other blog in this one because I feel the need to separate my public persona from my private one, only those that I let into this side of my life need to know the link between both worlds (you know who you are!).
Well, today I received notice that my work authorization had come through, so as you can imagine I'm ecstatic, just a few more days and I'll receive my card in the mail. Monday is my thesis defense and I'm spending the balance of the weekend getting the final preparations taken care of. One more course to review today and a final presentation to put together tomorrow morning and we should be all set. I pray that God will get me through this trial, because I feel more nervous than I've ever felt a day in my life, but I know that I have to put all that behind me and fight the good fight.
Yesterday I was speaking to Pebbles about some of my so-called friends that I don't speak to anymore because of a series of events that happened last year. I've decided that I'm going to destroy or sell any and everything that remind me of these people or my past life. The truth is that these people weren't my friends, they were more like my judges.
For 3.5 years I had to endure a boss who thought he knew more about technology than me just because I was from a developing country. In Jamaica we are taught the Queen's English and not this grammatically-handicapped drivel that they call American English (no disrespect to my American readers or friends out there), but yet I have to endure a boss who kept trying to teach me how to "speak American" and bombarding my culture-shocked young mind with his "linguistic" explanations for my "speech impediment". Well fuck you and the horse that you rode in on, there is not a damn thing wrong with my English (which IS my native language) and who gives a damn if I have an accent? Don't you have accent too if you go to another state?
I'll never forget the day that he brought some other guy into the lab, an American no less, to be a technical person and fix the problems that he (my boss) had caused in the lab in the first place. He even gave the prick his own office and, to add insult to injury, he brought him in at a higher salary than I was making. Well, it turns out that this fool couldn't even cut it as a CS major and knew jack shit about what he was doing, so he was asked to leave and I was given a whopping $0.25/per hour raise. Ummm, gee thanks boss, I guess you want me to get down on my knees and lick your balls now? Well, suffice it to say, this fool began to realize I wasn't just some dumb coconut and I actually knew what the hell I was talking about, so he respected me--ironically, he would always tell people that I was the he taught me all I knew about this Information Technology thing...yeah, ok, whatever.
Well, now I turn my attention to my co-workers. Some of them were cool and they didn't really bother me much, we were pretty alright. But there was this one Japanese bitch named Michiko that was just mean, spiteful and evil. I don't think you could find a bigger gossip than this bitch. She had something bad to say about practically everyone! Even her friends, she would talk shit about them behind their back. Then there was this Brazilian girl named Luma, who would have been alright, if she didn't think she was better than everyone. She couldn't function without her precious boyfriend and almost lost it when he went back to Brazil.
So, here it is that these two bitches spent their free time criticizing everything I said or did. I'm Jamaican, and Caribbean folks in general tend to be much warmer, friendlier and more open than many other nations. If they saw me complimenting a woman, "hi, nice outfit", "you look really nice today", "i love your hairstyle", that was grounds for them judging me to be a flirt or a dog. If they saw me hanging out with a female (and there are only females in the damn department, with a few exceptions) then I would be trying to pick her up. Screw you all! So, I can say with extreme confidence that I have washed my hands clean of these people. I'm going to destroy any documents or paperwork I had from that place, I'm going to thrash any gifts I received from any of these people, even the silver watch and pocket pc they gave me. I just don't care and I want nothing to do with these people ever again.
I feel that these people have stolen my confidence, my cultural identity and my sense of self. And I was a damn fool for letting them do this to me. I'm sick and tired of having to second-guess everything I say or do and wondering if people around me are wearing masks and whether or not they like me. I'm tired of having to be on my guard all the time and not wanting to be around people because I'm scared that they'll think I'm some nasty asshole or something. I'm tired of walking in the shadows of who I was, not sure of who I am, wanting to be someone else.
I hate them for leaving me like this, but I hate myself more for letting myself be this way. The only thing that I can do now is fight to hold on to my sense of culture in a society with a completely different value system. I need to adapt, yet I need to stay Jamaican. I need my friends now more than ever.
{nuff said} |
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| Idle Hands |
[Jun. 11th, 2004|05:48 pm] |
OK, I haven't done a damn thing all day today and I am 100% proud of the fact! I spent the whole morning chatting online and analyzing the lotto winning numbers for the past 10 years to see if I could come up with some frequency distribution that would make me a very, very rich man...sad to say, I lost about 3 hours of my life doing that! This is not to say that I've given up, I just need to come up with a better algorithm for finding the results.
Spoke to Pebbles this morning, she was pretty happy since the computer technician is coming over to deal with her computer today...I really need to teach that girl how to troubleshoot PCs better! Went to the bank and did laundry today--I know I'm in deep trouble when laundry becomes a key component of my daily writing...oh well at least I have clean clothes for the next few weeks :).
Must call Jalee and Bruceton to see what they're up to, but I just can't seem to find the telephone...oh that's right--it fell into the toilet and died, so now I have no means of contact with the outside world except for e-mail and MSN [j/k]. I've been so bored that I've been writing programs for fun and, to make matters even worse, I've started to talk to myself all the time, so now I'm reverting to speaking Jamaican patois once again [it was really bad when it took me a few minutes to switch from patois to english this morning when I was on the phone with Pebbles].
At any rate, it's Friday and I'm bored. I think I'm gonna lie down for a while and thing calming thoughts about the nothings in life...oh wait a minute, scratch that, I need to go hang up my clothes before they become [more] wrinkled.
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEDDDDDDDDDDDD......
{arf,arf} |
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| The Plan Worked!!! Mwahahahahahahahaha |
[Jun. 10th, 2004|06:18 pm] |
I finally did it! after months of careful planning and doing very little, I've come to a point where all my plans have come to fruition! See friends, what I am talking about is the fact that my advisor is now begging me to finish my thesis! Every week I go to him with a new idea and he loves it, but he further realizes that it's a huge task on my part and he still has to read my thesis! Well, he told me to wrap it up and have my draft presented to him by next week Thursday. If I hand't told you before, my defense is going to be on the 14th of July at 9:00am! Two hours later, if all goes well, I will have a Masters degree under my belt!
I am a little worried about the coursework portion of my defense, but I'm sure that the Advisor and the rest of my committee will be able to give me some guidance as to how best to study. I don't think it's gonna be that rough, but we'll see. I'm so happy that I've decided to take today and tomorrow off as a celebration and then spend the rest of the weekend working on stuff. I just wish I had more friends here, cause I'd love to go do something with somebody somewhere! I miss Pebbles, sigh.
Speaking of Pebbles, I spoke to her today, in fact we were speaking all day today! I was helping her to troubleshoot her computer [she got DSL], but I think she has a virus among other things. It was hard trying to tell her how to fix an Operating System (XP) without knowing what was going on on the screen and knowing that her interface was in Spanish. I'm stressed! Well, I think I'm going to find a little corner to roll up in and fall asleep.
{nuff said} |
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| Daze of Hunger |
[Jun. 9th, 2004|07:56 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  blah | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Pon Di Corner (G-String Riddim)--Mega and Delly | ] |
You know, this lack of eating thing nuh mek it (isn't working out). Last night I went to my fridge to get some dinner and, as it turned out, I had zilch, zero, nada...yep, you heard right, the fridge was as naked as a new born baby's butt on a cold winter night. It was only after talking to my friend F6 that I realized I hadn't eaten anything all day--save for some week-old rice that was lingering around. It was then that it hit me that I really, really, really needed to go to the supermarket as a result of the hallucinations I was having from lack of food.
I headed out to my car at around 9:30pm, but I ran into a group of doctors leaving the restaurant [inside of my building for those of you that don't know me]. Good heavens, they were loud and obnoxious and just didn't let me get by! I kept on trying to get around them and they found it more convenient to stand in front of the doors and chat about one of them who was apparently leaving the hospital but was going to be performing surgery even on the day he was leaving [boo hoo, poor doctor, I feel so bad for him...ohhh, what will the poor fellow do with all the money he's making from doing these operations?].
Anyhow, I finally get past the crowd of rowdy doctors...you know, I think that doctors, lawyers and dentists are some of the most obnoxious people I've ever met. I don't know if it has something to do with the length of time they spend in school or the fact that they might be just spoilt, rich people, but I do know that they are really obnoxious. Now, I'm not saying that only these folks are jerks, Lord knows that there are a bunch of arrogant, self-righteous pricks in my department, but it just seems that the medical and legal professions have a higher concentration of them...I could be terribly wrong and if I offend anyone, I apologize.
I get to the supermarket and am doing my thing. Shopping, having the time of my life, buying everything from cookies to pork to green tea to multivitamins--F6, your milk is in the mail...I suspect by the time it gets to you though it'll...hmmm, let's just say that I hope you like cottage cheese ;). It's always funny to see the people that go late night shopping. They usually range from the housewives who probably need some time away from the husband and kids [hence the late night shopping] to the hippies buying only organic vegetables and soy milk to the sorority girls traipsing around the aisles in their pajamas looking for cereal and other health food stuff to the rednecks buying diapers and cigarettes with their welfare checks and the sorority boys on their never-ending pilgramage to find the ultimate alcoholic beverage. Then there is me, the disheveled looking Jamaican roaming around the store looking for cheap milk and fruit drinks. I tell you, never a dull moment at the supermarket!
Well, after spending $75 on food [I tell you, it's the best $75 I've ever spent] I go home and make dinner. 4 hot dogs and 8 Oreo cookies later, I find myself totally satiated and watching Gigli, Black Samurai and Final Conflict [the last movie in the Omen series]. Can you understand how stressful it is to watch three movies at once? I mean it's an awesome thing to do, but you have to make up lots of stuff in your mind as you go along. However, if you catch the basic plot of the movie, it's not too hard. I don't recommend watching a romance-comedy/martial arts action/horror trio because it totally messes with your mind and makes it damn near impossible to fall asleep.
Anyhow, I'm done writing for now. I'll update more later as soon as mi head tek mi (I go crazy again).
{nuff said} |
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| As Days Go By |
[Jun. 8th, 2004|03:51 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | busy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Foundation Remix--Beenie Man | ] |
The days seem to be going by so quickly these last few weeks. My head is still spinning with the anticipation of all the changes that will take place in my life over the next few months. I've finally established a solid defense date for my thesis: Wednesday July 14, 2004. I'm yet to establish the time for my defense, but I'm thinking it's going to be in the afternoon--though I know that I'll have to be done by around 4pm. I would be lying if I say I'm not nervous. As a matter of fact, just writing about it is causing this weak, shaky feeling in my stomach. Father, please guide me.
I'm done working for today. I feel good having implemented the first of three modules of my thesis project. It wasn't as difficult as I had originally thought. It really helped a lot to talk to the Advisor and reduce the scope of the problem. Instead of dong 10 million things, which leads me to an NP Complete problem, I'm only trying to fix six things at the most. There will be time in my professional career to figure out these problems. Right now I just need to get my butt out of college and into my new job! I've decided that since my thesis defense is coming up so close, I'll probably begin moving on the 16 - 17th of July. I've gotten used to seeing Pebble's boxes in my apartment, so I'm not too intimidated by them anymore.
Well, somehow nothing really exciting has been happening in my life lately. My friend Krishna had a phone interview with Amazon yesterday. The interview didn't go too well, so I feel bad for the kid; however, he had an advantage over me because I told him exactly how the interview process went for me, so he had more of an edge than I did...though know that I think about it, I should be offended that he became interested in the company only after I did. Oh well, I already have a job, no need to hold grudges.
Anyhow, I need to think about what I need to buy at the supermarket tonight--if I manage to go. I've decided lately that I want to interact minimally with people [which is driving me crazy] so I'll wait to go to the supermarket until after my landlord is gone and the restaurant is closed...so pathetic am I. With all the reggae and dancehall music I've been ingesting over the past couple days, I'm worried that I won't be able to speak Spanish or English anymore!!!
{nuff said} |
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| How to become an insomniac |
[Jun. 3rd, 2004|06:27 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sleepy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Roses--OutKast | ] |
OK, I've become an insomniac once again. I've basically managed to throw my sleep system completely out of whack once again thanks to my obsessive, compulsive, workaholic lifestyle. See, in general, I'm very laid-back [read: lazy as a ludlam's dog] and I spend a lot of time NOT working. However, my lazy nature is offset by the fact that I have a tremendous capacity for completing a complex task in a very limited amount of time.
A side effect of this unorthodox work habit is that I tend to focus my attention on one thing and one thing only...as a result, I oftentimes forget to perform standard human functions such as eating, sleeping, using the restroom, showering and paying bills. Last night at around 10pm I realized that I'd been living on Mango Lassi and Kheer and Ice Cream for the past two days and was forced to order pizza from Papa John's.
Normally, I love Papa John's pizza and last night was no exception. However, I must say that the woman that took my order really needs to work on her telephone skills or they should fire her or something. I mean, I hung up from ordering feeling rushed and guilty for ordering pizza at that time of the night. Then common sense took hold of me and I realized that they were supposed to be serving me and I wasn't doing them a favor! The woman was just so bitchy and hardly listened to me, she snapped at me for crying out loud! I told her I didn't want [yet another] copy of Don Juan De Marco [they have a free movie deal: Don Juan De Marco, Trial and Error, Weekend at Bernies]. Oh well, I know what certain people will be receiving for Christmas ;).
At any rate, my original point is that I've gone 48 hours without sleep so that I could finish my uncle's company website. I'm pretty impressed with it actually [for the purpose of anonymity I'll not list the URL here...those of you that know me personally will be given the URL at some point]. It actually looks pretty good and, to my knowledge, is grammatically correct [given that I typed most of the text while fighting sleep]. Now I'm going to get a couple hours worth of sleep, wake up tomorrow morning and mail my OPT out, spend the day doing simple nothings, and pull a 72-hour programming stint so that I can get my thesis done...owing to the fact that I am tired of the damn school and I really want to just defend my work and get started with my new job as Assistant Professor of Computer and Management Information Sciences [forgive me for repeating my title, but it's just that I'm really excited about it, since I've lately realized that my desire had always been to teach anyway].
Well, that summarizes my life for the past couple days. However, I didn't really remember to mention another side effect of my prolonged work schedule...the fact that my brain goes into a mode of thinking where I literally try to process any and everything that I receive as input. So aside from working on the web site, I've spent the time analyzing things as abstract as:
- Where does Aquafina get the water to fill the bottles that they sell to us for exorbitant prices. Does it really come from some hidden falls in the mountain or is it just a bunch of little people boiling water (for a different, "purified" taste) and pouring them into bottles?
- Do the people that keep sending spam to my hotmail account encouraging me to increase my penis and breast size know something about me that I don't?
- What was wrong with the barter system? I have no problems trading my wife for a new cow or some beans for a Lexus.
- If I rented a car and smuggled it aboard a ship to a new country would the rental company charge me for the miles from the US to another country, say Australia, even though I didn't actually drive it to Australia?
- Does a left-handed glove really fit on the right hand if you turn the glove inside out? If so, if I turned my left shoe inside-out would it fit on my right foot?
- If teleporting were possible wouldn't it mean that every time I got "faxed" to a new location I would have to die [during deconstruction] and be brought back to life [during reconstruction] and what guarantee would there be that I'd be the same me when I arrived on the other side.
- Tom Cruise is American, how the heck can it be that he is the "Last Samurai".
- If tall girls like tall guys and short girls like tall guys what will happen when most short guys get bred out by natural selection will it mean that tall and short girls will then begin to like short guys again?
- Why do I always get my best ideas for making millions of dollars when I'm in the state between being asleep and awake and I can NEVER find a pen or paper to write my idea down. The worst part about it is that I never remember the idea until a year later when I see it advertised as an infomercial by someone who actually had a pen and paper.
- Why do people always tell you that you'll trip over your shoelaces if you don't tie them. I've been walking around with my shoelaces untied for the past 20+ years and I'm yet to stumble.
Well, as you can see, I have some weird thoughts streaming through my head when I haven't slept for a while and have been working for too many hours. This is the reason why I don't do it too often! One day I will master time management and be able to do everything on schedule without rushing to do stuff...but then it'll be too late and I'll be really old and not have many things to do [which will make things just that much easier].
{nuff said} |
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| And the Boredom Ensues |
[Jun. 1st, 2004|04:45 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  bored | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Holding out for a Hero--Fairy Godmother in Shrek 2 | ] |
Well, I'm on my lonesome once more, since Pebbles has up and gone to Spain for the summer. Sadly, she won't be back until August 11, so I have many many weeks of lonliness to look forward to. I really miss the girl, but in a way, I think it's good that we spend some time apart. We've gotten too used to seeing each other all the time and I think our minds have both been calling out for a bit more "me" time, though I must say that 10 weeks of me time is just a wee bit too much!
Went to see Shrek 2 today with Debbie. It was an awesome movie, funny to the end. It's good, in a sad sort of way, that Eddie Murphy is funny as Donkey, especially since he hasn't been funny since the late 80's. However, if I had my own way, I'm not sure if I'd like to have my most memorable role on the big screen as an animated ass.
After the movies, we went to Waldenbooks for a while and I picked up a book on C++, which I'll most definately need since I'll be teaching the damn thing in summer (as a TA) and in the fall (as a professor). Came home to see Mr. Goat (the landlord) and his family moving this huge-ass refrigerator into the building--apparently he's opening an Indian supermarket in addition to the restaurant....which makes perfect sense due to the fact that the other Indian supermarket sucks anyway and the large Indian population in Little Big City (99% of which seems to be on the engineering campus with me). So of course, I was doing my thing, pushing away with all my might. At least I got a container of kheer and a mug of mango lassi for my troubles.
Well, anyhow, I'm going to call it quits right now and go rest for a while before I start working on my uncle's website and learning all about C++.
{nuff said} |
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| Dazed |
[May. 29th, 2004|01:52 am] |
I know that it's been a really long time since I've last updated my blog. Things have been extremely hectic over the past few weeks and my mind is still struggling to comprehend all the changes. I suppose I'm a bit depressed, but I guess it's one of the things that comes from me choosing not to talk to anyone about my problems, so as to ensure that people don't have anything to hold against me later on down the road. I guess we call that "learning from our past experiences".
Pebbles is leaving for Spain on Monday. The trick is that she's going to be leaving for Philadelphia on Sunday morning by train because her flight is going to depart from there early on Monday morning. I feel really bad about not being able to take her, but it's a holiday weekend and renting a car is impossible and, to make things worse, my car can't really go anywhere too far because I need an oxygen sensor for it. This time, it's something that I knew would eventually go, because this sensor sits inside of the exhaust pipe measuring all the nasty gasses that get produced by the engine to tell the car's computer when it needs to increase the flow of fuel or cut the flow. Well, because the sensor isn't working too well, it tends to lie to the computer and the computer will shut the car off sometimes...not a major problem, but major enough to cost me $160 and the inability to take Pebbles to Pittsburgh to catch the train. Thank God for Nichelle!
I was helping Pebbles to move her stuff to my apartment today, in preparation for the big move to our new apartment in July. I was suddenly overcome with a great sense of frustration and, what's that word?, fear. We have so many things to move and I really don't know if I can do it...I'm really worried about my couch, which seems to be the most difficult item on the list to move. I know that in order to move efficiently, I need to do a lot of stuff the weekend before I call the guys in to move my stuff. Krishna and Sebas have already told me that they'll help me to move, I need to hit up Bruceton to see what he's doing...Lars is a possibility, but I need to ask him--though I'm not too sure that I want to do that. Besides, knowing Krishna, I'm sure he'll be able to round up another Indian or two that I'm friendly with to aid my cause.
The next major concern that I have is my Practical Training. I finally got the letter from the Advisor stating that I will be graduated on the 10th of August, so I turned it in to the International Office on Wednesday. They told me that I need to come pick up my verified package next Wednesday afternoon. I'm very hopeful because I think I'll actually have the work permit before I start the job, God willing.
Well, that is the type of things I've been thinking about lately, right now it's 2:30pm and I need to get some sleep...
{nuff said} |
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| Moving Daze |
[May. 17th, 2004|11:03 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Movin' on Up--Jefferson's Theme Song | ] |
It's amazing how the entire course of your life can change in an instant. Several days ago, I had a plan to move to faculty housing at my new job at Really Tiny University. I had planned to come see Pebbles on the weekend and she would take over the lease for my apartment from our landlord, Mr. Goat. He was going to cut her a deal and she was going to pay the same amount I'm paying now (even though he increased all the other rent by a substantial amount for all the tenants) and since I was going to stay with her on the weekends, and sometimes in the week depending on my schedule, I would help her to pay some of the rent and half of the utilities...in addition to paying rent and utilities at my new place.
Well, this plan isn't going to be because on the weekend Pebbles had a falling out with Mr. Goat over the fact that he didn't want our friends to stay here for the night. It was all because our friend Mikey used to be a tenant of Mr. Goat's and shit went bad between the two of them, so now he doesn't even want him on the premises; however, things got worse when our friends Marco and Theresa werent' allowed to stay either because they were *friends* of Mikey.
Well, to make a long story short Pebbles told Mr. Goat's son that she was moving out, a decision which she later regretted because it was made in haste. At this point, I decide that Mr. Goat is my friend and Pebbles is my girlfriend and I really don't want to get involved in anything between the two of them. I wasn't really much for moving her either, because I knew that it would be messy to find a decent one bedroom apartment (we've come to terms that the roommate thing isn't going to work) in downtown Little Big City. So, in order to save her butt, I decided not to move and instead commute to work on a daily basis--I'm sorry Mitsy, I love u very much but you're going to be driving really long and hard the next few months until I can get a sister or brother for you.
So, that is my crazy life thus far and I'm so freaked out by these sudden changes that my head hurts like crazy. But the night is still not over yet, because I need to sit down and calculate what my expenses will be like once we move into the new place--God help me. For those of you interested in the "Law of the X" that I wrote about in my last post, be sure to check my other blog (angrydog) for an explanation of the concept in a day or so.
{nuff said} |
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| Law of the X |
[May. 17th, 2004|12:00 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | drained | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Stairway to Heaven--Led Zeppelin | ] |
I lost my faith in people today...
Why is it that I must stand in judgment of people for the mistakes I've made? It doesn't make sense to me, love me or hate me; but just leave me the hell alone. You have your lives, I have my life...stop whispering my name in the corridors and hallways like it's a dirty thing. How easily you forget the good I've done for you in the past. I guess the term "friendship" can be trivial when the only person that benefited from the relationship happens to be you. How easy we forget the sacrifices I made for you, when it was a struggle for me to ask you for even the smallest of favor. How easy it is for us to forget...
For the rest of you that wish to tell the tales of my life like it's a soap opera, screw you. I do not need you to spread stories of my successes and failures to those that would stand against me. Leave me alone and let my life belong to me.
And so it is that I am forced to live my life by the Law of the X. In mathematics, X represents the unknown variable that must be solved by understanding the problem. And so the Law of the X represents my life...let the details of my life be unknown to those that do not known the details of who I am well enough to understand why I do the things I do. I've come to realize that I do not need to tell people the details of my life, I really don't need a confidante or a shoulder to lean on because I deal with my problems on my own in my own time on my own terms. I love the few friends that I have with all my heart, especially Pebbles and a few others who know themselves...but the rest of the world can piss off.
I lost my faith in people today...
{nuff said} |
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| A Good Margarita Day! |
[May. 14th, 2004|12:10 pm] |
It's another Friday in Little Big City and I'm sitting by the PC watching some guy install an A/C unit in an apartment window across from my place. That reminds me, I need to install my A/C in a little bit also. This place is just too hot for a normal person to cope...I'm from Jamaica and I'm still complaining!
Need to meet with the Advisor today to talk about my thesis. The plan is that by the next meeting with him [hopefully next week] I'll have my literature review [major pain in the ass], introduction (chapter 1), metric outline (chapter 2), and a brief case study of the metric (i.e. some examples that I'll put in chapter 3) done. It will be excellent to have four chapters written up and ready to be reviewed BEFORE the summer session starts because it basically means that I'll have only two more chapters plus the appendices chock full of source code left to do...and I'm pretty sure that I can get them done by the end of Summer I. I think I'm looking at a thesis that's going to be a little bit less than 100 pages...or maybe not, but we'll see, because the case studies may be a little bit long and I need to write a conclusion telling all the future work that I would perform if I had time and resources [hmmm, funding in my future?].
Oh yeah, that's right, I need to bug him about my letter of intent because I need to get my OPT stuff taken care of by next week and I also need to call my boss at the new job to tell him that I accept. Dang, things are going so quickly that my head is spinning with all the excitement. Today will be a good day to unwind I believe. Me and Pebbles are gonna meet up with Nichelle after I get done with my meeting and we're going to have Mexican!!! yaaayyyy!!! I love the sweet, farty goodness of Mexican cuisine!
Hmmm, you know, I was just thinking about stuff today and I realize that I actually do miss my buddy F6...somehow or the other we connected in terms of humor and perceptions of reality. Too bad we didn't meet sooner, otherwise we'd probably have had a bunch more good times in Little Big City. It's funny though, cause I don't usually miss people much when they leave, but I guess I must be getting more sentimental in my old age or something...
At any rate, I think I'll be really happy with this job that's coming up because it means I might actually be able to go to Jamaica for Christmas and, since I'll have nothing to do in the boring little town that I'll be working in, I won't have much choice but to work out like a little monster...so when I go home I'll be ripped, shredded, jacked, and fat-free. Have mercy, with this coupled with my [narcissistic moment coming up] dashing good looks, I'll be able to wow my friends, family, and random chicks with my gorgeous self--but just for the ladies, look but don't touch, cause I'm taken :).
However, I think the harsh reality of me not working out and spending time chatting online and watching TV will set in and I'll probably go home fatter than when I left and my friends, family, and the random chicks will probably call me names like: "Homer Simpson", "Butterball Turkey", "Big Porker", "Fat Bastard", or worse yet..."Porkchops Pimp Daddy" [hmmm, that last one didn't sound too bad now that I think about it].
Anyhoo, I need to quit talking sh*t and go take a shower so I can smell powdery fresh for the advisor ;) ;).
{nuff said} |
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| College Professor |
[May. 13th, 2004|09:29 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  thoughtful | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Fast Car -- Tracy Chapman | ] |
Well, I was recently inspired by my friend F6 to start this new journal to document the daily happenings in my life, so I feel that today is as good a day as any to start! Three more months to go and my life as a graduate student here at Little Big University will officialy come to an end. Right now I'm in the process of writing my thesis and I'm hoping that it will be a good enough to generate lots and lots of research for me [and others in my field] in the very near future. Getting a few conference papers published will be wonderful!
In a way, I'm really happy that I'm done with grad school and I'm also happy that I have a job lined up--my new, official title will be "Associate Professor of Computer and Management Information Sciences", sounds pretty good doesn't it. The cool thing about being a professor at Tiny Private University is that if I ever decided to do my PhD in some discipline [might not necessarily consider Computer Science as a PhD option just now] they'd actually pay for me to do it--the only catch is that I'd have to do it at Little Big University. Who knows, at some point in time I may pick up another Masters Degree in Software Engineering. The thing is that right now my main focus is on teaching, research, and so on. But the big goal is that I need to get my business ideas off the ground in two years time [or less].
I think I'm a little bit hesitant to take the job because I'm worried about the fact that it's a really comfortable job and I'm afraid that I'll get too comfortable and lose my edge in the Information Technology field. I'm 27 now and I'm totally into technology and making things better--I'm just worried that the longer I stay there the less excited I will be by the industry. So, therefore, I have to make every effort to stay in touch with what's going on. Another thing that's bothering me is that I'll have to move to this little town that's going to be boring as anything and I'm going to miss being around Pebbles every day. But I guess I can commute often during the summer and less during the winter, plus I'll always be with her in Little Big City for the weekend AND I'll be spending all next summer with her...so I think it works well for me.
At any rate, I think I'm going to talk to my dad first then call and accept the job tomorrow afternoon. Aside from that, I'm really excited about tomorrow because I'm going to get to hang out with Pebbles and our friend Nichelle [going to eat Mexican food!!!] nyum nyum! Speaking of which, I hope my Uncle Two comes thru with sending me some summer survival cash--otherwise I'm gonna be in some deep doo doo with my rent and other bills! New job, please hurry up and get here so I can start getting paid and finally pay of the debt that my car repairs have left on my consience! I like being debt free and I do want so much to be debt free once again.
Was sitting down by my computer talking to the credit card company when I heard this loud wailing sound and I thought that someone had got hit by a car or something in my parking lot! Turns out that there was this huge American woman sitting on the ground crying her heart out...I have no idea what was going on, but it's obvious the poor woman was in distress. Fortunately someone came and helped her up--I'm not sure, but I know she wasn't physically hurt...there were a bunch of papers strewn
around her and I'm guessing her distress had something to do with the papers.
Speaking of which, it seems that lately I've been witness to strange sightings in Little Big City. For example, the other day Pebbles and I were walking by the parking garage near by our apartment and I saw this homeless lady lifting her shirt and rubbing her boobs. Then there was another time I was standing inside the same parking garage with my friends from work and I saw this dirty, handicapped, Jerry Springer looking couple physically fighting each other--that was pretty funny, but got to be a bit much when the woman chased the man down with a plastic bag filled with some unidentifiable objects, slapped him in the head with the bag, fell to the ground and busted her nose and lips...we all just started walking away at that point.
The most interesting sightings I've seen though have been from my apartment window--I've seen two Japanese lesbians make out [or at least I assume them to be Japanese because of their style of dress and the language] not to mention the girl that was giving a guy a B*J behind this garbage dumpster and didn't know that it was a regular peeing spot for the drunk natives--it was totally awesome to see the expression on their faces when some drunk dude just came in and did his business!
Anyhoo, I'm in the process of cooking some chicken--nyum nyum and I need to go attend to that. I feel sad that Pebbles isn't going to have any of it because she's on the Kellog's Special K Challenge so for the next few weeks I'm cookin' for one! Though I think I really do need to try the Challenge myself and see if I took could lose 6 pounds in 2 weeks.
{nuff said} |
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| Almost Done!!! |
[Dec. 8th, 2003|11:35 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  happy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | I Can See Clearly Now--Jimmy Cliff | ] |
Well, I finally got done with Dr. C's paper on viruses and worms! I'm really happy with it...sounds professionally written, 19 pages long (including references) and chocked full of diagrams. Things with Pebbles and me are a lot better now, we talked a little bit yesterday and today, and I actually think we're going to make it.
I need to cut this short now, because I'm going to head down to Dr. C's office to drop off my paper and come back and study for his final (though I still need to figure out what time it's at!).
{nuff said} |
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